Someone said something to me one day…it was intentionally done to diminish my identity. I knew it and they knew it. It’s someone who doesn’t do it to just me but others. I believe it comes from a place of hurt and insecurity. It places them in a “higher seat” or “place”…it’s a way to control. When we try to control a situation or a person we inflict pain on that person in some way in order to get the upper hand when we ourselves are feeling insecure. For me, at that moment I felt diminished and my identity was crushed.
Have you ever had that happen…someone says something to you one way, but the meaning is loud and clear as to what they are really communicating? It’s meant to sting.
When it happened my first response was anger. Underneath the anger, I was hurt. It went round and round in my head for hours…it reminded me of my many vacations at the beach…standing on the sand looking out at the ocean…walking into the water…getting knocked around by the waves. This particular time at the beach the waves were pretty strong. I got knocked down quite a few times…you know how it feels…the saltwater floods over you. Your eyes begin to burn and you find yourself trying to get your footing so that you can once again stand up and get above the waves.
I’ve been reading the book Think Differently Live Differently by Bob Hamp. He shares many great nuggets in his book on walking in Freedom. Our greatest obstacles are the lies we believe. On page 140, “Since Satan is ‘the accuser’ his accusations directly assault your mind and heart. He also seeks to harass you through the voices of other individuals in your life. As ‘the adversary,’ he seeks to keep you from discovering who you were truly created to be.”.
The real question I had to ask myself was not who the person was who challenged my identity but why did I feel my identity was challenged. I believe it came from a place of hurt from my father. In order to gain his attention and acceptance, I had to prove myself. His way of correcting was through control. It wiped me out as a little girl who only wanted to please him. So even as an adult, there are certain people when they talk to me like my dad did, it generates the same response.
Bob Hamp shares the way out of bondage into freedom can come when we recognize “the lie” we believe about ourselves by going back into that painful memory and see that God had been there all along. It is then that we realize we have seen ourselves through the eyes of the people who inflicted the pain, not our Heavenly Father.
I went back to a specific memory when I was hurt by my father, and rather than focusing on my dad, I saw God was there all the time. My perspective was suddenly jolted when God revealed to me how He saw me. He saw me as a little girl with a huge amount of potential. And, that every gift he placed in me was from Him.
God began reminding me of the truth that countered the lie of who I was truly created to be not who the Accuser wanted me to believe. Rejection, shame, and fear left and were replaced with light and joy and freedom.
Later in my vacation…after an afternoon of having fought the strength of the waves in the water, I had come in for the day and was standing on the 7th-floor balcony in the condo we were staying in, looking down at the water. The waves looked so much smaller and less powerful from up there. Why? My perspective had changed.
Our perspective changes how we see ourselves. This hurtful experience that someone had inflicted on me became a catalyst for me to fuel my passion even more for the ministry that God has called me to…Freedom Weekends at my church. As He uses me to help others to be free, I’m becoming more and freer.
Take that Satan! You’re a liar! You aren’t taking me down…God tells me in His Word that I am more than a conqueror through Christ. He also tells me that I am the head and not the tail above and not beneath. I believe that is exactly what He is telling you today as well.
What is the lie you have believed about yourself? What is the truth that God is revealing to you right now in this moment?
Walk out your new identity in Christ and be free!
Conversations That Matter
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